Ready, Set, Go!

My wish list for 2008!
* A winning lottery ticket.
* More time for play, reading, exercise, and creating.
* A new President we can be proud of!
* Continued good health.
* Happy News.
* Peace to All!

Top 7 of 2007

I have had a crazy year, one that has tested my personal strengths, values and limits. But, thanks to supportive family, friends and students, different trials have brought rewards. As the year rolls to an end, here is where I stand: I am in the middle of 4 different insightful books, divas with guitars still rock my world, my daughter still remains the center of our little threesome universe, and I now carry my husband's hand-me-down digital camera everywhere I go. In the mode of my parents, who always love to ask, "What was the best part of ~your trip, your holiday, your year?," I'll give you my Top 7:
1. An extended family trip to Miyazaki in March.
2. Lucy's tap dance recital in June.
3. Visiting Montana family and friends in September.
4. A Sexy Six Girls Tour de Utah, Seattle and Portland.
5. Visiting a friend's pottery kiln firing.
6. Tuesday nights downtown.
7. Lunches with girlfriends.

Christmas concert

Lucy's school had their Christmas concert yesterday (Christmas Eve). Their first spot on stage was this dance, a tap dance to Frosty the Snowman. They weren't always in sync, but were trying so hard and seemed to be having so much fun. Her class is a mix of twelve 3, 4, and 5 year old kids, with a class of smaller 2 and 3 year old that they get to play with often too. I think she is learning a lot of social skills, and picking up a wonderful curiosity, constantly vocalizing questions and offering her own ideas of why things are the way they are. The best thing about the school she is at now is the supportive group of parents that have become a pillar of support and friendship for us. Merry Christmas to my dear family in the USA, and to our cushion of friends here!

Nine little pigs!

They did a cute version of The Three Little Pigs. Lucy was Will, who built the brick house and cooked up a soup for the pesty wolves to fall in when they tried to sneak down the chimney.

Hand bells!

At age 3,4, and 5, her class is learning to recognize musical notes, and played a near perfect "Joy to the World" for the finale of their Christmas concert. So impressive!

Joy to the world!

This is Lucy playing the "mi" note on the hand bell. They played the song "Joy to the World." and were amazingly good. She already has a sense for music, and its definitely not from my DNA! For this hand bell song, she and her classmates learned the song by singing it as "Do si la so fa mi re do so la la si si do,etc" (which I had to just have her recite to me since I have NO clue!) And having learned this, she can sit down at the piano and play it! She started piano lessons just two months ago and has had just about 6 lessons in total, so I am so impressed. We are negotiating now to try and get the piano from her grandparent's house that never gets used for her to have here to practice. Her father seems to have the same ear for music, so he will have to do the coaching!

Winter Break is here!

I had my last classes on the 21st, and have holiday until the 8th of January! Just knowing that I don't have to be up and out of the house by 7:45 (with Lucy in tow) lifts my spirits sooOOO much! Eiji is not so lucky. Instead of Christmas cards, everyone here sends New Years Postcards which have to be pre-sorted(starting this week) and ready to deliver brights and early (about 4 or 5:00am) New Years Day. So, Mr. Mailman Eiji starts a 10-day long marathon of going in early and working late, with no holiday until January 3rd. Lucy is also off from school, so I have entertainment duty for the next two weeks! We have a few plans, including lots of dinners or visits with family and friends. We had a pre-Christmas party yesterday at a friends home, and had Eiji`s whole family at our home this evening for steak and my version of Shephard's Pie. Tomorrow, Lucy's preschool will have their Christmas concert and short English plays (she is the brick-house pig in The Three Little Pigs!). We will have a party with some of the parents and kids following that. Christmas day may be quiet, then we have another Christmas Potluck party with students on the 26th. Then, our vacation will begin. Lucy is getting a new bicycle for Christmas, so maybe we will try to master the no-training wheels riding over the holidays. Japanese usually do their annual big house cleaning the last few days of the year, so I might try to convince Lucy we should play "cleaning ladies" instead of the usual "play house" or "play school." Merry Christmas to anyone who happens to read this on the 25th!

Disenchanted with Christmas!

Just in the last year, I have become disenchanted with so many things. My list includes organized religion, education and politics. Yet, in the same breath, these three things are what fascinate me most. Don't get me started, or this blog entry will be a mile long. What I am really bothered with this season is the commercialism of Christmas. Japan is an amazing place for this! Stores here probably simultaneously (or even a few hours earlier if you consider the time zone time lag) took down Halloween decorations and filled every shelf and advertisement with Christmas images and marketing. My favorite morning radio program has tossed out the questions, "Got you Christmas shopping done yet?" or "What will you eat for Christmas dinner?" and loads of listeners called in with their "Don't know what to buy for my husband," and "Our family's tradition is Kentucky Fried Chicken, champagne, and chocolate eclairs." It makes me lose my enthusiasm and appetite for the holidays. So, my poor family in America had to hear me whine about not wanting to buy Christmas presents. I don't like to mad rush of shopping malls like I used to, and I can't bear to think that I am adding to this marketing frenzy. So, apologies to my family. I would pay anything to be with you over the holidays...but I'm holding out for Hawaii in March!

I have such amazing memories of our family Christmases at Grandpa Eccleston's house, and opening stockings by the fireplace in my childhood home. I guess it is time to create new traditions that will be just as meaningful for my daughter, and fitting for what this season means to me now. I will keep you posted!

Sing Karaoke Gaijin style

One of our friends here in Japan recently told me that she extended her contract in Japan just so she can do more singing at karaoke. Tonight, a regular school/work day night, we went with this friend and a clan of 10 other friends to sing a 2-hour farewell to our new friend, Keith. Keith has been in Kumamoto for 6 weeks, and we decided that he couldn't leave Japan without a proper karaoke experience. Going to karaoke with our Japanese friends and international friends is quite different. Japanese tend to let one person sing alone, and they most likely have a very good voice. Foreigners, on the other hand, sing along to everyone else's songs, and enjoy making a mess of the lyrics and tune for fun. I like being able to sing along without having to sing by myself and expose my awful singing voice. Tonight was Lucy's first experience. We tried to get her excited by singing one song dedicated to her, LUCY IN THE SKY WITH DIAMONDS, and then JINGLE BELLS, D0-RE-MI (Sound of Music), but she was a little shell shocked. Actually, after about 40 minutes, she fell asleep! Oh well, we continued with the likes of Johnny Cash, Bon Jovi, ABBA, Paul Simon, Kumi Koda, Blue Hearts, Green Day and Mariah Carey.

I miss my central heating!

People sometimes ask me what I miss about America. Honestly, beside my family and friends, I don't miss too many things until they jump out at me from the supermarket shelves when I venture home once a year. Strange, but when I'm in the states, most of my nostalgia is food, and most often cheap food like frozen chicken pot pies, Granny Smith apples, pudding packs, and hearty grain breads. But, the thing I really, dearly miss is central heating! Japanese homes, especially the old ones like the home we rent, are not made for winter. There is no insulation, and the outer walls and floorboards are as thin as my mousepad! So, I am sitting at the computer right now, still wearing my jacket, a scarf, gloves, wrapped in huge blanket. And the winter is just beginning! In the worst days of late January and early February, I peek my head out of the futon covers and can see my own breath! We heat one room of our house, then bundle up every time we have to go to the kitchen, toilet or computer room. No fun for the next few months!

GUNS

In my university class discussions at Kumamoto University this week, wherein we addressed the differences between the USA and Japan, almost every class asked me about the USA's gun society. In Japan, you can't get easily get a gun, and really nobody besides the yakuza gangsters, a few wild game hunters, and police (who only carry them in special circumstances) have them. Watch any Hollywood movie and its easy to assume that most Americans have them. Here are some of my own thoughts on guns:

I have never seen a real handgun, and have no real fear of guns. If you choose to join a gang in the USA or the yakuza in Japan, your chances of encountering guns is much greater. But, for the most part, regular citizens in the USA have no exposure to guns in their every day lives.

Yet, I know many stories of people who died in gun related accidents. One was a young boy from our hometown who, while cleaning his gun in preparation for the annual hunting season, shot his own brother by mistake when playing around with what he thought was an unloaded gun. Another incident was the suicide of one of our close friends in high school, who was clearly distressed with overwhelming personal circumstances, but who might not have died if her brother's gun was not so easily accessible.

I have fired a shotgun a few times with family members doing shot practice in the woods. A bit scary, but thrilling none the less. I grew up watching my father and brother bring home deer or elk during the month-long hunting season in Montana. Our family ate this meat year-round, and there was no question that the guns in our house were meant only to be used during hunting season.

A sad story of a young Japanese boy, named Hattori, who was an exchange student in rural Louisiana around 1992 and knocked at the wrong house, dressed in costume for a Halloween party. When the man at the door pulled out a gun and told Hattori to "freeze," he didn't understand, didn't do as he was told, and was shot and killed. Japanese people now know the word "freeze" quite well, and are further bewildered by our insistence on having the right to keep guns. I tried to explain to students today that this, "right to bear arms/ right to protect my own house with my own shotgun," is interpreted differently by different individuals and different regions of people. If a wild dress man came to our home in Montana, we would lock the door and call the police. Others choose to take the law into their own hands.

The USA has many wonderful freedoms, but with every freedom, and every right, comes responsibility.

In Japan, I am very clear in vocalizing my dislike for guns and other weapons. Guns or swords, whether they be metal, plastic or paper, are prohibited from our home, and I am constantly telling children around me to stop pointing weapons at people. I wish I could tell our President the same thing! Violence in any form, domestic or global, only breeds more violence.

USA vs JAPAN

This week in my university English classes, we have been debating which is better, Japan or the USA. I asked students to prepare questions to ask me, and also to brainstorm 10-15 words that first come to mind when they think of the USA. From the 6 classes I had this week, I would have to say the most mentioned words were:
Hamburgers ... Melting Pot... Statue of Liberty... Guns... Freedom... Hollywood... George Bush... MBA,MLB,and NFL... Big Scale

One of the questions that was asked in every class was, "Which country is more comfortable to live in?" I have a hard time answering this question. For most people, I would say that America is an easier place to live because of our freedoms. In Japan, there are definite expectations about how you should act...at school, at the workplace, anywhere in public. Of course, Japan has their fair share of independently minded people who don't care about fitting the norm, but the expectations certainly exist. I, in many ways, as a foreigner, am lucky in the sense that I am not expected to fit this mold. I have lived here long enough and learned enough to understand in most situations how people are expected to act, so when it is beneficial to me, I follow suit, talk the talk and bow the bow. But, when I don't agree, or just plain don't want to do something, I have my Gaijin/foreigner trump card that allows me to do things my own way and get away with it. So, in a way, I am living an American-ish lifestyle here. My students, or my own husband, being Japanese with no good excuse no to be, have to do the synchronized dance no matter what. Granted, the USA has its own fair share of stereotypes and narrow minded thinking, but there is clearly more room for being different and stepping out of any pre-formed stereotypes.

For now, I am enjoying my life in Japan, especially days like this when I get to do a bit of crashing of the minds; confrontation that helps us all to grow!

Kickin' at the Kiln

Had a wonderful weekend, retreating twice to the hillside of Mt Kimpo. We actually live at the foot of Mt Kimpo, the biggest mountain in the city, the backside of which is home to some of the largest tangerine orchards in Japan. Our first retreat was with some of Lucy's kindergarten friends and their families to an orchard where you can pick and eat tangerines to your heart's content, then eat a barbecue overlooking the Ariake seacoast. It was sunny but refreshingly cool, and so relaxing to chat with friends while the kids played nearby. Our second retreat was last evening, when we visited our friend's pottery kiln just a tangerine toss from this orchard. He advised us to come before sunset and watch the sun set over the sea...and this picture here doesn't do justice to the beautiful bright pink and purple hues that filled up the skies not soon after we arrived. The rest of the evening, I vowed to hit the hills and forests more often. My senses were dancing with the sound of branches and leaves crunching beneath my feet as I walked around. Flashback to summer camp, Georgetown Lake, and hiking with my family. Breathing in the smoke of the kiln and seeing the roar of the flames when they opened the hatch to stoke also brought me back to evenings at camp or the fireplace in my childhood home. Our friend commutes from the heart of the city to his rustic studio and kiln on the hillside of this mountain nearly every day. I have another friend who commutes from a quiet village in Aso to the city just as often. Which is the better deal...if you could do only one or the other...to live or work in the countryside while commuting to or from the city?

Try a song!

I wanted to introduce one of my favorite songs by Lisa Loeb, Try from her album "The way it really is," but couldn't find it on Youtube to direct you, but did find a song of the same title from another of my favorite singing chicks, Nellie Fertado, which you can watch at

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqcdTrCrguo

Still, I prefer Lisa Loeb's version, with my favorite line:

You'd find that the mountains aren't so high (....if you just take a better look...)

Ok, just flashed back to a fun story. Before I had a child and could make spontaneous plans at the twitch of my whim, I turned up the radio to hear a newly released song of Lisa's, disappointed when the d.j. cut it a bit short, but shocked when she said, "I am jealous of all of you who get to go and watch her tonight at the Z-side concert hall tonight in Fukuoka." Less that two hours later, after canceling a lesson by telling my student the wild truth of where I was going instead of her class, Eiji and I were on a highway bus to Fukuoka with our fingers crossed that the d.j. was right: that they did have a handful of tickets left. They did..she is so adorable and cool.

Foaming wine

A book I must reread:
Either/ Or
by Kierkegaard.

His writings were my bible during the 4 short months I spent studying in Copenhagen, Denmark.
Whenever I ponder the future, I always think of foaming wine full of endless possibilities.
Or, as my translated version of his work reads:

" My soul has lost its potentiality. If I were to wish for anything, I should not wish for power and wealth, but for the passionate sense of the potential, for the eye which, ever so ardent, sees the possible. Pleasure disappoints, possibility never. And what wine is so foaming, what so fragrant, what so intoxicating as Possibility. "

What color is your bathroom?

Color coordinating. My brother and his family are building a new house, so I want to buy them something for Christmas to decorate their new home. When I told my husband that I need to call and find out what colors their rooms are, he was confused. Maybe its the fact that our house right now is a crazy mix of colors, patterns and clutter. Or, maybe Japanese don't decorate their homes with this color coding system. I will ask around. I remember going off to college and having to have all mauve bed sheets, covers, towels and toothbrush holders! I do like a bit more variety now.

Or when I was having a baby, my mother was so anxious to know how I was decorating my baby room. Baby room? Well, that ended up being a corner of our bedroom, done neutrally with teddy bear bedding and a few cute postcards on the wall.

Found these cute glass dishes at the flea market yesterday. Weird how the season attracted me to the golden orange.

New old treasures

Found these cute cups...10 of them actually...at the flea market yesterday too. They are too round to really drink out of, but fun with something little inside.
Can't wait to open up a shop someday!
It WILL happen!

Is this hot?

I am addicted now! I can now understand why my husband always has his camera with him. Its so fun! But, when I take 5 photos of the same thing on different settings, they all look SORTA good to me, but which is really best?

Or is this HOTTER?

Which is the better photo? Beats me!
It's a vending machine, by the way. Here in Japan, you can get hot drinks from the vending machine...hot canned coffee, hot chocolate, tea, hot lemon drink, corn soup, and a funky hot sweet bean drink!

Aloha Lizards!

Love and hugs to my parents who are a few time zones closer to us now in there new home in Kona, Hawaii! I hope a future job will take me somewhere warm with a seaside view for six months someday. While I am needing to bundle up in a blanket these past few days, my mother was complaining of the heat and humidity that greeted her in their new home. But, what also greeted her was a few geckos crawling around. To hear my regularly squeamish mom talking so calmly about "getting used to them" was a shock. Welcome to my world! I am constantly wiping up gecko poo, and occasionally smacking a cockroach or centipede that has peeked its nasty head into my vicinity. I normally think geckos are pretty cute, when their webbed feet are pressed against the windows. But only when they are OUTSIDE the window. If I find one inside and can't manage to sweep it out the door or window, I imagine them crawling across my face in the middle of the night and get spooked! Like lizards, geckos also have that magical ability to lose their tail and go on with their bug-eating business as usual. I have proof. I accidentally slid our screen door over a gecko's tail this summer, only to have it revisit me almost every evening on the window above my kitchen sink while I washed dishes. Seeing its stubbed tail, which makes its crawl look more like a wobble, I couldn't help but feel bad for the poor thing. The cool weather has sent them into hybernation or whatever they do during the cold...so I wonder if I will see it again next year. What might the life span of geckos be anyway? I hope I can go and visit the Hawaiian geckos, apparently a cuter green species compared to our dusty gray ones here!

OYA BAKA

How do you NOT be a doting parent? I can't help it! Not in the moments when she is talking back to me (using words that she undoubtedly heard her own parents say), but definitely in moments when she is trying so hard. The one good thing my daughter has inherited from me is creativity, and she is allowed to cut, paste, paint, or draw any time she wants in our house. I have a huge case of colored paper and craft materials that I have stocked for making teaching materials, and she regularly digs into this and creates whatever her imagination conjures up. Today I caught her in a lip-clenching moment of concentration while she was painting. A child trying really hard and using her imagination...how can you not adore that!

EN GA ARU

" We have the same socks," said my student. Well, almost the same, and close enough to deserve a photo! In Japanese there is a phrase EN GA ARU, which basically means that WE HAVE A CONNECTION. Finding that connection is so fun! Reminds me of the bestseller book I read ages ago, The Celestine Prophecy. Don't remember the bulk of the story, but do remember fancying the idea that meetings with people, no matter how brief or seemingly insignificant, are not coincidental. This also reminds me of the last day of my first stay in Japan, when a person I had never met hosted me for a formal tea ceremony, and presented me with the caligraphied rice paper that was thoughtfully hung in the tea room for the occasion. On it was written the saying, ICHI GO ICHI E, which reiterates the same message that one meeting connects you forever. So, when my student finds something that we have in common, even our socks, I am happy to have made another connection.

The ground I tread

I am where I've been. The places I've been tell a lot about who I am. I am 37 now. What is the first place you think of, for example, when you were 13? Let me give it a try:


1 - Fairbanks, Alaska... where I was born
2 - A pink house on Pine Street...I remember just from photos
(from age 1-6, I have no memories...my first memory is the day my younger brother was born, when I was 6!)
6 - Anaconda, Montana...my young stomping grounds
7 - The Benny Goodman "Green Grass" Park
8 - Georgetown Lake
9 - Yellowstone Park
10- City League Softball field
11- Mr. Everhard's sixth grade class
12 - Mr. Gallagher's English class
13- My junior high school locker, between J and D
14 - Legendary Lodge
15 - My Grandfather's House
16 -Anaconda High stadium and gym
17 - East Coast ... family trips to Boston and D.C.
18 - Rockford Illinois...where I spent the summer with G&G
19 - Carroll College campus
20 - Copenhagen, Denmark...and Eurorail trains
21 - Dance floors in Helena
22 - Uto City Elementary Schools
23 - Beijing and Quillin China
24 - Classrooms in Anaconda where I substituted
25 - Kumamoto Prefecture's International Affairs Office
26 - Handball court...practicing with our Yoka International Team
27 - My KIA car, driving from Montana to New Mexico and back
28 - Arvin, California and Australia
29 - English Conversation school
30 - Tettori Church...on my wedding day
31 - Private English classrooms
32 - At home with my newborn daughter
33 - University classroom
34 - Ito's Yatai Restaurant
35 - Antique stores and Flea Markets
36 - Chicago at Christmas
37 - My daughter's school events

Where will my shoes lead me next? Cheers to the possiblities!

Who would you invite to dinner?

I love the text that I use for my university English classes. This week, the students have to choose 12 people from the past or present who they would want to invite to a dinner party. Why these people? What kind of party would it be? What might happen there? Students inevitably ask me who I would want to invite, so I am going to brainstorm my answers right now.

If I could have a dinner party, I would invite:
1. Joseph Campbell - Anthropologist whose reflections and retelling of myths I adore!
2. Bono - Lead singer of U2 and die hard humanitarian
3. Cleopatra - To see if her beauty and charm still work today
4. Aimee Mann - Singer songwriter whose words make my soul dance!
5. Audrey Hepburn - To see if HER beauty and charm still work today
6. Kevin Spacey - I adore him on screen, but want to watch and listen to him up close
7. Jesus- To see if HIS beauty and charm still work today
8. Mohammed - HIM too
9. Buddha- HIM too
10. Confucious - HIM too
11. George Stephanopoulos - news magician - who could keep these people talking
12. My daughter and husband - So we can experience this party together!

The party would have to be a week long, however, because I would want ample time to talk to all of them, and to watch them interact with eachother. What do you think?

Kool Fids!

How do you know that a teacher really loves her job? When she is willing to dress up and act like a fool in front of all her students, their parent, and a handful of friends. I teach English to kids in my neighborhood at the local community center two evenings a week. This weekend was our 3rd annual Halloween Party, with 50 kids and their parents. Preparation exhausted me, but when it was all over, I couldn't help but feel that I am so blessed by the people that surround me! I taught my students the words "cute" and "scary" this month, pulling things like plastic lizards, frogs, Hello Kitty, and other odd toys from my daughter's toy box for them to judge as cute or scary. In this funky collage of fashion accessories, I got a generous half-and-half judgement when I asked all the kids, "So, do I look cute or scary today?" When parents are looming in the background, I am always doubly nervous teaching to a crowd. But this year, the kids' laughter and positive feedback from the parents gave me energy. Some moms let us roll them up with toilet paper to become Mummy Mommies, and this boy under the ghost sheet in my "Guess Who the Ghost Is Game" kept everyone laughing. THANK YOU kids and mummies! I am so lucky to get the chance to teach and play with you every week!
Later, a group of friends came to our house for a potluck dinner party. I enjoyed cooking for the first time in a long time! From the kitchen, I listened to the conversations of my friends becoming friends with other friends, and the laughter of our kids playing so well together. It was music to me ears, and I found myself again thinking about how lucky I am to be surrounded by so many good people. It reinforces what my friend T once told me, that the best way to find the right path to be walking is to surround yourself with positive, happy people. Its amazing how the positive energy reverberates when you do!

222

With the Hallowed Holiday on its way, I have been trying to think of any scary stories I know to tell. I can never retell ghost stories very well, nor jokes, but how about hearing my quirky fear of the number 222.

It started in my English Lit. 101 class at college. As a freshman, our hippy professor's choice of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance was way over this young country girl from Anaconda, MT. I carried the book around and seriously tried to drag myself through it. The first day of discussion after a week of reading, I was lost when Mr. Hairy Philosophy Major started going on and on about, "the endless white wall that couldn't be reached but was omnipresent and drowning us." Whaaaat?? After this, I started having encounters with 222. I would look up from my Zen reading or other studying, or wake up in the middle of the night and the instant I looked at my digital clock, it would be 2:22. In the next two weeks, I had shopping totals come to exactly $2.22 or, and could not stop rolling anything but 2s on dice during a board game I was playing with friends. The last straw for me was when the English professor walked into class and his first words to us that day were, "Please turn to page 222." I remember gasping so loudly that half the class turned and looked at me. I really didn't know any of the other students, so I had to just duck my head and pray that the prof wouldn't ask me to explain. Even to this day, if I see that the clock in my car is 2:22, I hold my breath and pay extra attention to the road until it changes. I also can't set a heater or air conditioner to 22 degrees, and deliberately change it to 21 or 23. On the positive side, when or wherever I see 222, I flashback to these days of venturing. Mr. Hairy, but the way, ended up being a nice guy who gave me my first and last tennis lessons the following summer.

Country Gold

"This isn't Japan," claimed one of my Japanese friends. "But it's not America either," I told him. He was getting his first taste, peek, and earful of Country Gold, the country music show held here in Kumamoto every year. It's really a world all its own. Everywhere you look, people are dressed in full cowboy western gear, with authentic hats, boots, leather fringed pants or shirts...the whole get up! Every year, in the awesome outdoor venue where over 20,000 people can sprawl out on the grassy slope surrounded by mountains, Kumamoto is the host of the largest country music concert in Japan. If you just listen to the music, you could mistakedly feel like you were at the Saturday night concert of any U.S. summer county fair, but when you see the stagefront dance floor crowded with over 200 line-dancing fully costumed Japanese, hopping and kicking in sync, those thoughts soon disappear. I was shocked to see bus loads of tourists, mostly line-dancing groups from all over the country. At 8000yen ($90) a ticket, I wonder if its the dancing or the music that attracts so many people. I guess I have to ask myself, why are we there almost every year? I guess its just the atmosphere that is so entertaining and relaxing to me. We spend the day eating, drinking and lounging around on the grass...what can be better! Oh, the music isn't bad either. I usually only know the name of the final act, this year Mark Chestnut (last year Charlie Daniels!). This year the other groups were a family bluegrass group, a jeans and t-shirt "grungy" boys country group that threw in a Bon Jovi song in for fun, and a pop-country sexy blonde duo. Have to admit, we managed to get free tickets again this year, plus tickets for 11 more of our friends, so sharing the joy was also part of the fun. I can't really explain...y'all just better come and join us some year!

Hospital Phobia

I am so envious and inspired by people who choose to work in a hospital or regularly give blood. If I walk into a hospital, within 10 minutes, if there isn't a chair for me to sit down, my head starts spinning and sweating without end. It doesn't matter if I am going to visit a friend or going for some check-up, just being there makes me queasy.

I had my first mammogram yesterday. My family has a infamous history of breast cancer and other cancers, so I have been getting regular checks since I was 27. Until now, I had only gotten ultrasound examinations, which allowed me to avoid the painful smash and most importantly, let me lay down. This time, I had to stand for the mammography, and part way through, I felt my head start to sweat and head start to spin. The nurse let me sit down for a minute and throw my head between my legs to get some blood flowing back where it should. I tell you, though, all I could think of in the end was: what happens if I faint in the 3 seconds it takes to take the photo while my breast is clamped to the machine! I endured it and the results showed that I have happy, healthy breasts, but I spent the whole rest of the day half nauseous and dazed.

So, I give praise to my students who are now studying to become nurses or medical technicians. Honestly, the week I spend reading these young guys and girls' essays about why they want to work in the medical field is so uplifting. Their reasons range from personal medical tragedies or emergencies, heartbreaking or heartwarming stories of family struggles with illness, etc. They give me hope in the future when everywhere else we hear how young people are destroying our society and themselves. Choosing to spend their adult career in a hospital, half knowing what they are getting into, is so honorable and brave, I think.

Then I salute husband, who is a fanatic blood donater. He gives blood religiously once or twice a month, and brought home a 100th anniversary crystal cup last year from the clinic. He says that he has no righteous or charitable motivations that keep him going back...but that it has just become almost an addictive habit. Just hearing about the huge needles they use for his blood donations gets me half queasy!

Dis-Dis-Disney

We just returned from Disney On Ice. I can't help think that we paid a lot of money to endure a 2 hour marathon of movie previews. Character after character paraded around the ice, waiting for kids to enthusiastically scream out their names. And when your kid doesn't know one of the characters, like a G.I.Joe soldier from Toy Story(?) or the fairy who gave Pinnochio life (I was shamed to embarrassment when I first said that she was Tinkerbell...forgive me, Walt!), are we supposed to rush out and rent that video so our child does not grow up to be Disney-dumb too? Granted, I grew up loving Disney movies and was a weekly viewer of the Sunday evening Disney program that came on after The Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kindom, another favorite. But, when I tried to show my young daughter some of the movies...thinking Disney would be ok for my two year old as a welcome alternative to Tellatubbies...I realized how scary and sad many of the movies are. Above all, where have all the positive women gone. Ever realized how many hero's or heroine's mothers have died, turned evil, been tortured or simple are never mentioned...Cinderella, Nemo, Snow White, Dumbo, Belle, Aurora, Ariel. And why are so many of the bad guys gals? Maybe my daughter is a little more receptive than some kids, but I didn't know quite know what to say when my 2 year old asked me why Cinderella's mommy died, and when was I going to die. I can't even remember what I told her, but I do know that I have been much more conscious about videos we rent these days. These days, she prefers the archives of Lizzie McGuire or Sponge Bob! Sorry, I shouldn't complain too much since the tickets to DOI were a present, but I will encourage her grandparents to spend the 17,400yen (160dollars for three tickets!) on something more worthwhile next time.

Pieces of peace in the city?

I have a book of daily reflections that I read once in a while for contemplation. Yesterday's reading contended that it was impossible to find peace in a city, that the rush and noise are barriers too overbearing to block out. I beg to differ. So, let me brainstorm for you some of my sources of peace these days.
My daughter's laughter, heard from a distance or blurted out amidst her late-night dreams.. . .The escape of a good book.. . .Smiling nodding heads in a classroom.. . . Good news that reminds me that it isn't as bad as we like to assume.. . . Using gifts I have received or bought for myself and remembering the person attached to it or the special place I was when I got it.. . . Praise. . . .Spontaneous kisses.. . . Being asked for advice.. . .Overhearing someone taking positively about something I believe in, with a feeling that somehow my presence or thoughts are being felt by them.. . .Being with any part of my extended family.. . .Sleeping children.. . .Older couples holding hands.. . .Being at a party where everyone is having fun and suddenly realizing how much time has already past.. . .Introducing people I care about to eachother.. . .Finding a perfect gift or incredible bargain.. . .Seeing good people find success.

As my mother once told me when we had talked about what God looked like, if you want to see the face of God, or to see pure peace, you have to find the most beautiful part of every person, hold them close to your heart, and if you then put all of these beautiful pieces together like a jigsaw puzzle, you would see pure peace. I will keep looking!

Walkin' Talk

A couple of my friends have taken up walking as exercise and diet...and every time I see them they really look thinner. I am so jealous! I had high hopes of exercising and dieting during my month home in Montana so I could get off the plane in Japan and show off my new waistline to my husband. I arrived back with a new waistline, but not one to show off. Instead, I dyed my hair "Intense Auburn" and let the beautician cut it super short so I could at least give everyone a little surprise. Anyway, I started today walking for an hour before going off to work. I have promised myself an ipod to put some bounce in my step if I can keep it up until Christmas. I really miss my walking partner, Kim, who kept me in shape during my pregnancy...but maybe I can talk my friends into letting me join them on their walk once in a while. My husband, in his current job, walks an average of 12,000 steps just at work and can eat and drink anything he wants now and not gain an ounce of weight. Jealous again!

Dancing Queen and Chicken Napping

I still have boxes of stuff at my parents home in Montana. This past summer, I managed to salvage some crazy memories from the stock of old journals I have stashed in one box. This was my impetus to start this blog. Rereading through these old journals was an amazing retracing of my own footsteps along a winding but pleasuable path. One journal entry made me smirk in particular:
My freshman year at college, I was dating a cowboy who would take me out to the local country bar to teach me how to jitterbug. Since he was a senior, he could sweettalk the bouncer into letting me in without an id. This was half the thrill...and getting tossed around the dance floor, and then getting caught midair was the extra thrill. The cool thing was when we entered the jitterbug contest at the college's spring barn dance and got second prize! We beat out one other couple, clearly better dancers, simply because the girl knocked off her partner's sacred cowboy hat. (Yep, folks, they don't allow that!) Now, I had remembered that, and little else about Cowboy Charles, but what I hadn't remembers was getting dragged out of the dance later by one of my drunk friends to go and catch a chicken from the farm next door. Yes, I was an accomplice in bagging up a poor sleeping chicken and then letting it loose in the middle of the dance floor!
This would be one of those stories my mother would say, "What I didn't know couldn't hurt me." More of these memories to come!

TJIT, Tomorrow is Tuesday!

Even my 4-year old daughter knows what Tuesday means. For us, it is our ritual weekly night out. Unless one of us is deathly ill, my husband, daughter and I spend every Tuesday evening at our friend's yatai restaurant downtown Kumamoto. Never know who will show up, but doesn't much matter. I don't have to cook and don't have to think about housework or school work. Tuesdays started as a farewell party for a business English class I was teaching, and has become a laid-back come one, come all, eat, drink or just stop in and say boo gathering of friends and friends of those friends. I have come home a few times and actually apologized to my husband for dressing like such a bum... I forget that we are downtown because the place has become our second home and I feel like I am kicking back in my own living room. Far away from my family in Montana, the Tuesday "Kayokai" gang deserves credit for being my weekly stress release, sounding board and support group. Some people do AA meetings, I get therapy enough sharing a drink with my KK group.

HeyHEY DAIGAKUSEI!

I just want to say to my students out there...Let's do some clashing..crashing...stir things up!
There is nothing taboo in my class! Please, PLEASE, speak your mind!

I hate early mornings, but I love being on campus. I remember my university days and look for pieces of my gradually forgotten self in your faces and words. Whether they be direct questions to me or bits of conversations I overhear, your thoughts keep me in tune with what it means to be 20 today. What does it mean to be 20 today? Tell me! Show me! Let's journey together!

Here I go!

Just starting...half begun...half finished...relieved...anxious...settled.

At a crossroads today, I have decided...as always, the best way to move is forward!
I am excited about this new conversation ...with my own heart and anyone else who is ready to listen to us.
Hop, skip, jump...here I go!